turmoil, fever, bittersweet hell

There will be no more excuses. I write when available and fluid. Blah. Granted I actually wrote some good junk yesterday, right before I took myself a 13 hour+ nap. Fell asleep sometime around 5pm, give or take, and got up this morning at 6 to get to my guidance appointment 45 minutes early. Oh the joy of being on Spring Break. With no social life. Yip yip yippee. Well tomorrow is the last weekday left of this magnificent break, and I must get as much sun as I possibly can, worshipping the sun has been my one enjoyable outlet this week. Besides learning how to communicate and open up to another stranger. Good tears, good times.

I suppose I could reimpose the complete rant I went on yesterday, but here's but a glimpse. Ha (vislumbre de la vida).

Primero, some random thoughts/words/phrases I jotted down..:

To whom do I give this honor? Blessed Assurance. Chrysanthemum (t'was simply boasting since I could spell it). Blistering Irony (thanks, J Balls). Waste Away the Day.

And then I found this old thing, resting in my folder, hopelessly on the back of a doodle:

oh! what bliss

through whisper and hiss

does the wind carry the song

through the doubt,

pain and drought

my soul yearns for the song

so the song goes:

once I loved

once I fell

felt turmoil, fever, bittersweet hell

+didn't quite finish it, but it has some promise ;)

maybe someday...

and for tonight, I will not reimpose any more, but leave with:

People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.

Well said, Mr. Szasz (pronounced /sas/), well said.